because she (hilariously) believes she's logged in as often as Daniel Berk, the reigning champion of screen time and digital caffeine consumption.

after a day of toddler dental hygiene that involved extracting canine tootsie rolls from her 2-year-old's pearly whites, she’s now considering a career in extreme toothbrushing.

Nominated as the person who loves Spindrift most on this platform (but not actually because it’s impossible to love it more than Daniel Berk)

because one time she said "beach chicken" on LinkedIn and the entire Internet had a meltdown (or so she says)

He just wanted to nominate himself. No real reason. He’s just tryna see something…

For being your favorite thought leader’s favorite thought leader

Because of his hair.

For being Daniel Berk (???)

I’m a mediocre at best guy trading stocks from the spare bedroom and making walking videos. Trying my best.

😏

for being an insanely handsome GTM architect (his words, not mine).

for never growing out of her teenage Twilight obsession.

Because I told him to nominate himself 🙇‍♂

for having the best and most unique combination of useful Hubspot posts and 💩 posts in the entire state of Vermont, among people with brown hair who write short fiction as a hobby and have the initials NS.

because after a very nauseous pregnancy and having a son last fall, she’s back to putting time and energy into sharing thoughts and building connections on LinkedIn

She nominated herself without reason, and in doing so revealed she has a Top Voice badge, which troubles me.

because she won SMGOTW (I will not be accepting any questions at this time)

because New Jersey is the most underrated state in the country.

because without him I would not exist (he is my Dad).

because he’s got a pretty dope garden going this year that he is remarkably proud of.

because they had a 50% chance of getting on this list.

because she learned about ragdoll cats last week and has already become a literal expert on their colors, markings, and grooming habits.

because their boiled eggs are always on point but they literally don’t know why.

Because there is a 78% chance this person is actually me.

for being the angriest screaming possum on all of LinkedIn

He is my dad.

for creating the world's most average content. It's not good, it's not bad, it's just... perfectly average.

so her future kids can tell their classmates, “My mum made that list"

He makes his own memes (or so he says)

for being a chinless corporate egg…??? Legit no idea what this means and I’m scared.

for being recognized as having the most outstanding and highly acclaimed restroom facilities on the professional networking platform, LinkedIn

He nominated himself to be the first person to respectfully decline this nomination, thus qualifying him to be on this list.

for being able to type over 100wpm but unable to ride a bike.

for working to build something that gives me joy because I know it will be able to help people the way I always hoped to when I graduated with an engineering degree. Even if no corporation hires me because I lack experience or am not a culture fit.

for having the most kids flying business class this summer.

because her dog runs away and brings her pizzas (with picture proof which is insane how)

because he was born with a sixth finger and hasn't forgiven his parents for having it surgically removed.

because they can cook scrambled eggs in a stainless steel pan.

because he always bring the best snacks to the party. No one leaves snackless and everyone gets snack packs (please ship me a snack pack)

for coining “Disguised Demo Quiz Switch n Swap Quiz for SaaS companies and Tech Companies” who believe they have more sales and growth potential in their existing traffic

because in the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police, who investigate crime; and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories. Dun dun, dud duh duh dun dun, dun dun.

because this list needs an artist on it supposedly.

for being the most likely to own an alpaca someday.

for randomly coming out of my hidey-hole, creating buzz for a short time, getting scared of the attention, and returning to being a hermit for several months.

for having the cutest dog (allegedly)

for spending too much time on LinkedIn.

for never making a single mistake in his life and for exuberant humility.

because she threatened me.

for being best dressed on LinkedIn. However, he’ll be unceremoniously dropped from the list after a bizarre appearance on Good Morning America where he will take a controversial stance on windbreakers and unsuccessfully try to wrestle George Stephanopoulos to the ground.

For liking all my stuff on, and if excluded, threatening to comment “ 😢 “ on every post I make for the next year.

for becoming a first time dad this year and not making a post about it on LinkedIn....the temptation was REAL [and broken by this comment]